February 3, 2010

Love Language

Brent and I are going to read the 5 Love Languages By Gary Chapman together.  I am excited...him, well not so much.  Here's the deal.  We had this super fight on Saturday.  How come?  Because of spilled soda on the floor.  Not really a big deal...well it was, kinda.  Sooo...we argue, I cry...We talk.  And we came to the conclusion that we do not communicate very well.  Well...lightbulb moment. :)  I am naturally a doer and a giver.  Meaning...I do things for you....if you need milk, I am happy to go get if for you.  I like to tell you that you mean something to me.  I leave notes, and cards...yadayadayada.  I am not a natural huggy type person.  I have to make myself be that way.  I don't remember ever getting hugs from anyone other than my Mamaw.   So, last night I went online to http://www.garychapman.org/ and did the online Love Language Assesement.  Well...guess what my love language is?

Love Language Scores:

10 Words of Affirmation
9 Acts of Service
5 Physical Touch
4 Receiving Gifts
2 Quality Time

Interpreting and Using Your Profile Score:

The highest score indicates your primary love language (the highest score is 12). It's not uncommon to have two high scores, although one language does have a slight edge for most people. That just means two languages are important to you. The lower scores indicate those languages you seldom use to communicate love and which probably don't affect you very much on an emotional level.

Words of Affirmation

Actions don't always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important--hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten.

Acts of Service

Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter.

So...as you can see...I show love the way I best recieve it. I am almost a dead tie between Words of Affirmation and Acts of Service.   This also explains why sticky soda on the floor or a trip to the dry cleaner that didn't happen all upset me so much!!!!  I am very interested to see what Brent's score is!   This explains why words hurt me so mucha and how come I get so hurt when I ask for help and get ignored or get a I'm too busy.  I would be willing to guess that Brents is going to be quaulity time and touch.  We'll see.  We are also going to read the same book for our kids.  The Five Love Languages of Children.  It can't hurt to see what theirs is also!  I am very excited about this.  I did not...by any stretch of the imagination have a good role model for how to be a good parent, wife, or mother.   I realize that I am showing so much of what I hated growing up and THAT is not a good thing! 

I'll let you know how it goes!


Julie said...

I am willing to bet that Brent's is physical touch! Because every guy I have talked to about this is the same...physical touch. hmmm....

I've had a hard time figuring out some of my children's love languages. Alex's used to be one thing and is now something else. But anyway, it's a great book and it does help communication tremendously! And it helps our kids feel our love much better when we speak their love language.
have fun!

~Amy Jo~ said...

I'm anxious to hear about your progress!