December 19, 2009

4am ramblings

I am so very Blessed. Shall I count the ways? I have a husband that loves me and works so hard...his working hard gives me the ability to work part time....which gives me the ability not to put my children in daycare...which allows me to be a much larger part of their life...which makes me happy. I have a job that is supportive and ladies to work with that are my dearest friends. I have life long friends that know all of my stories...both good and bad...yet love me completely anyway. I have three amazing children that bring me joy, some tears, and some frustration....that I love to the moon and back. I have a family...both immediate and extended and God given...that lifts me up when I am down, loves me, and believes in me. I have a beautiful home that is comfortable and safe. My husband has a job that provides for us well. I am loved and saved by my Lord and a daughter of the King....

Yes, I am Blessed. I AM BLESSED beyond measure. So, why is it that I forget? Do you ever do that? Just forget. I get so caught up in the schedule, the stress, and frustration of everyday life...I mean WHY is it that my children can remember every single lyric to any Taylor Swift song...but CAN NOT remember to flush the potty or pick up after themselves. UGHHhhhh Why is it that my hubby can not seem to anticipate what I need? Some days just a pair of ears to listen to my need to fix them. Just listen and say...Babe, your right....that sucks. Is it too much to ask that when I come home its a little bit better than when I left? Do you ever get that way...the little stupid things pile up and then your all mad and really it is for no reason. For me, then I have a hard time shaking it.

Well, I decided today...after a "proud" moment...You know one of those moments when you say...ya, I just blew it as a mom/ wife/ friend....fill in the blank. I had one. I had a rough preschool party day. Not a bad day... a rough day. There was an unplanned fire drill...meaning the fire department showed up because the alarm actually went off. Well, 13 four year olds in socked feet and no coats...down the stairs, out the door and to the football field we went. They were awesome. I love those kids. Ya, that completely threw off my morning. When I got home...I was tired and the kids were whiny, the TV was loud. I had all these gifts from my sweet kids. I wanted to open didn't happen at school because of the aforementioned fire alarm issue. The baby was in this, the The Diva was messing with that, The Drama Queen was arguing because of something, and the hubby didn't react fast enough. So, I blew up ( so proud) and sent myself to bed. God love that man...he let me sleep for over three hours. Refreshed! Renewed...realization....I was a Witch. They didn't deserved that because I had a rough day.

Common sense idea #1

Treat the family with the same consideration as I do EVERYONE else I come into contact with.

Common sense idea #2

They are kids. Remember....?

Common sense idea #3

I am overstretched and this leaves me irritable and less tolerant of my own family....(for the LOVE???)

So, starting now. I am going to do better, communicate my needs better, and be a better me....

1 comment:

~Amy Jo~ said...

Tis the season for some blow-ups. This crazy time of the year where we see just how blessed we are, but get super overwhelmed by all we have to do. Thank you for sharing as it helps me remember there are others who have similar struggles as I do.
Love you, friend.